Tag Archives: Always Remember

JOLT-ON! 2024: RAILs with Road Runner and Wylie E Coyote!

Random Acts in LEGO… sharing the antics of Road Runner and Wylie E. Coyote with Elise and Sophie!

What is “RAILs” you ask? It is our take on sharing “Random Acts of Kindness”… LEGO style! Watch out for them along our ten day journey between Ethan’s birthday and his leap into eternity day this year.

We sent our friends, Elise and Sophie Chamberlin, the Looney Tunes set of Road Runner and Wylie E. Coyote. Last night, they set aside time to complete the set and remember their long time friendship with Ethan on his birthday. Our family met the Chamberlin family back in 2005 through Bible Study fellowship at our church. At the time, Ethan was 5 years old, Elise age 3, Sophie just a baby and Noah was not born yet! Our families have been doing life all these years together.

Even Ellie their dog joined in (however it is obvious she is not so trusting of that Road Runner!).

Thank you for joining us in remembering Ethan!

Do you have a story of sharing “Random Acts in LEGO” with others? Please share your story in honor of Ethan’s legacy with us! We cannot wait to read it and be encouraged by your creativity.

Be on the look out for our next RAILs moment!

NOTE: Comments are moderated and posted within 24 hours

24 Today…

On this day, your would be 24th birthday, I can only look back and see how unbelievable it is that you are walking with Jesus for two years now. Certainly is an uprooting like no other…

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 
So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.
For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Remembering the last birthday we had with you. Fixing my eyes on Jesus and the eternity that awaits. Missing you every moment son…

JOLT-ON! 2024 Memorial Game Days: In Pursuit of the Brick

If you knew Ethan, you know his capacity for Lego! It has been two years since Ethan took his last giant LEAP into Heaven … In this second year, we have been carefully investing our time and resources into the friends and communities that Ethan cared so much about.

In honor of the engineer and builder that Ethan was and will be forever, we have chosen to theme this years Memorial Game Days on one of the favorite activities both our sons enjoy, building with Lego’s. To those who choose to remember Ethan with us, we invite you to have some creative fun with these iconic bricks.

If you do not have any Lego’s, feel free to participate with any other fun activity that builds fellowship with those you care about. Please also consider sharing a photo or short story with us. When you do, we will send you a JOLT-ON! commemorative sticker or magnet as our thanks.

Ethan had earned a Material Science Engineering degree (Polymer focused) with the dream of working for Lego. He often enjoyed building, creating and teaching with LEGO’s throughout his 22 years.

WHEN: May 30th through June 9th, 2024

This time period starts on Ethan’s Birthday and ends with his Heaven day. You are welcome to extend out into the year ahead if your timeline of remembering is further along in the calendar.

SCHEDULE: Wang Family Events to Remember

Our Family will remember Ethan with the following activities and will share them here during the Memorial Game Days:
-Support Campus House Kids with Lego Learning sets
RAILs: Random Acts In Lego… sharing bricks with others!
Droid Builds, a free build activity originally created by Ethan
-Create a 25-30 second Lego Stop-Motion Video
-Record a time-lapse video of our Memorial Lego Build on June 8th-9th

HOW: Set aside time to remember Ethan and engage in a Lego themed activity

Here are some creative ideas to encourage you to join us…

  • grab a bin of your own Lego’s and build free (Ethan) style…
  • check out Lego Insiders and download Lego coloring pages to share with little one’s in your life
  • donate a Lego set or two to a local charity or children’s center in memory of Ethan
  • play a Lego board game (Heroica, Lego Chess, Creationary, Lego Creator) with friends
  • play a Lego video game (the many Lego Star Wars comes to mind)
  • host a watch party showing Lego Batman or The Lego Movie… there is probably one showing on a streaming service right now!
  • into video making? Use your Lego’s to create a Lego themed 30 second or less stop-motion video like Elizabeth’s or inspired by the one Ethan and Noah made together back in 2016!
  • need some laughter? Watch the recent Lego Star Wars 25-Second Film Festival created by all the fans for the 25th Anniversary of Lego Star Wars.

We are looking forward to all the ways you are remembering Ethan as this second year comes to a close! Please share in the comments below. If you have a file or image to include, please email it to jolton@wfour.net and we will add it to your comment post.

NOTE: Comments are moderated and posted within 24 hours.

I Just Need You to Know…

On the situation of grief, how long do others really give you? Three days, three weeks or (at most) 3 months is my experience. Really. That is it. I have experienced every sort of tactic (blaming, shaming, yelling and other sorts of verbal violence) to try and get me to “move on”, “cheer up,” get back to “normal”… and shockingly these attempts have come from some of my closest relationships. What a tension this world brings to the one grieving the loss of a son or daughter. Such an unnatural order of loss and yet people move past the reality of our situation with brevity. So, now that my family is approaching 23 months into this new life without Ethan and with the mess of grief in surround sound, I have some things I just need you to know. May it be the Lord’s will to help you understand my response… 

We are not the same people we were before June 9th, 2022. Do not expect to find the same person you knew before that date. Our former selves died that day with Ethan. The loss of a child changes a person. Regardless, we still serve the same God, believe in His goodness and trust His plans for us.  We experience God profoundly now walking forward.

You may see or experience us become emotional at times for the rest of our life. Emotions of grief come in waves that one cannot fathom or predict. It does not mean I have lost my faith. Nor does it does mean I am in need of some type of “word” from resources that are giving you comfort. While everyone around us seems to seek temporary “comforts”, we actually do not.  It is the farthest thing from our minds and hearts still even now.  The three of us actually cannot even comfort each other.  The Holy Spirit carries us daily. We grieve with hope as I Thessalonians 4 tells us to.  However, we have no desire for comfort in the same manner the rest of the world does. 

We would rather someone tell us “it is good to see you” or ask if we have eaten today. Those practical words we can respond to. Otherwise, we stagger at the oft asked question, “How are you?”. To this day, it is one I cannot answer. My response is not one of happiness. I find my mind trying to cope with those I encounter in this manner by searching out other languages for context on how to say a simple “hello”. Such as in the Mandarin Chinese language where “nǐ chīle ma” is a simple hello greeting which really means “have you eaten?”. Saying “hello” without a question is most helpful.

Please know we will never be able to move on.  Only those whom have lost a child truly understand this.  Grief stages have no order and no ending. We are not “stuck”, but rather the opposite. It is the Lord whom has placed us exactly where he wants us to be. Other bereaved parents tell us there is no moving on.  I cannot even fathom feeling this loss as anything less than it felt the moment I learned Ethan had died. In some way, we will carry a certain amount of grief that shows up in the unexpected the rest of our life.  You can try and shame or manipulate us into “moving on” with your words or even with your silence; however, those tactics will only create distance. Having been given the blessing of our sons, the loss of Ethan so suddenly is a difficulty I cannot explain.  So, I will not try. 

It’s okay that I am not okay. It’s alright that I am not alright. In spite of that statement, we are somehow able to wake everyday with breath in our lungs. Somehow, I manage to get up and care for myself, our family, attend to work and details of living. I ask the Lord “How” every moment of each day. Lament is consistently my song. Lament is not wrong. It provides a biblical passage of wrestling with the Lord (expressing fear or complaint, asking boldly, turning to trust) that is well documented in the Psalms.

There is no fixing. There is a brokenness that will not be fixed in this lifetime. We have a blessed assurance for heaven on earth where we will be with Jesus face to face, find wholeness and reunite with Ethan again. Until then, every day is too long. 

I will say what I need at the right time. Most of the time, we do not have the emotional stamina to deal with trivial matters when our minds are focused on the eternal. Many come at us with their need.  When this happens, it is often too overwhelming to sort out our own needs. In addition, grief brain is real. It robs us of the ability to clearly communicate, exhibit patience or even respond with grace. Do not be offended if we decline social activities. At times we can show up to it and other times we just cannot. We are figuring out a new normal. One that is unfamiliar and uncomfortable.

The joy we experience now is not what others want or expect to see exhibited in us.  We experience biblical joy every day. The call to express joy is everywhere in the bible, especially joy in the face of suffering.  Very common references often quoted are James 1:2, Phil 4:4, 1 Thes 5:16 and I could go on.  However, the understanding of this joy is profoundly in front of us right now.  It is not a required “happiness” (which is worldly and fleeting).  Joy comes from the Holy Spirit. The biblical joy we experience is thus:  “Joy is the settled assurance that God is in control of all the details of our life, the quiet confidence that ultimately everything is going to be alright (when Christ returns and heaven is established on earth), and the determined choice to praise God in every situation.”.  This is us.  This is the joy we have chosen from the first moment when our son died and everyday since.  We see joy and the fear of the Lord in a much different and more profound way than others can even imagine.  The power we experienced from our God and Savior is terrifying in light of our present reality. 

All that said, Jesus is my strength day by day.

Other helpful resources:
There is a really helpful podcast I found not too long after Ethan leaped into heaven. The episode below in particular has helped me shape how I respond to challenging relationships in these days. Before you seek to challenge us in any way, please listen for understanding.
Episode 9 | Ten Things Bereaved Parents Wish You Knew
While We’re Waiting® – Hope After Child Loss

Solid Joys Devotional by John Piper
Seven Sources of Joy

PS… I resonate with the Bereaved Parents Bill of Rights as it is also a good reminder that we have the right to grieve in the way God is directing us… after all we are walking in His will for our life.

First Street Towers Memorial Trees

6 Memorial Trees: Royal White Eastern Redbuds

Planted September 7, 2023
First Street Towers
Purdue University
West Lafayette, IN

We traveled to Purdue this weekend to see the memorial trees we had commissioned for planting last year. The trees are finally installed at the new First Street sculpture garden outside of the center tower off of Mitch Daniels Blvd. These are under-story trees and will grow to eventually 20-25′ in height. So, they are starting out small but we know they will make a big impact to the surroundings, just as Ethan did when he lived at First Street during his undergraduate studies. This species is a less common white flowering variety which will be very exciting to see in bloom next spring!

You can see the record of the trees from the Purdue Arboretums interactive treemap website… Many thanks to Brooke Sammonds, Landscape Architect on staff with the Purdue Grounds division, whom helped with the process of choosing this site and her efforts toward making the memorial trees a reality this year!

Campus House at Purdue University

We feel a deep connection to the people of Campus House at Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana. Pastors, staff, members and attenders have poured out their love on us since we stepped into the church when we were discovering Purdue for our son Ethan back in 2016. That first meeting was within the walls of their older building… a “mushroom-like” place in the heart of Purdue.

Located in the heart of Purdue’s campus, Campus House is a Jesus-centered, non-denominational church community being formed together in His ways for the sake of the campus, the city, and the world. For over 50 years, our heart has been to reach Purdue’s campus and Greater Lafayette with the love of Jesus, to encourage and equip disciples who make disciples, and to be a sending base for mission and ministry throughout the world. God has brought a unique mix of undergraduate and graduate students, young professionals, families, and retirees into our community, so whatever your life stage, you belong here. We’d love for this to be your church home on campus.

Campus House Website: Who We Are

When Ethan became a student at Purdue in the Fall of 2018, he jumped into life on campus and with the Campus House community. We are so grateful for everyone whom welcomed him and walked alongside him with the rest of the student population in the four years of his undergraduate degree. He had returned to the community of Campus House the day he passed away. It was a beautiful day, challenging each other to live for the Lord in bible study and the care of the men in his life at Joshua House.

This community has honored our son and his commitment to follow Jesus even now in these days without him. Campus House hosted a Game Night on June 7th, 2023 for our JolteOn Memorial Game Days and brought together friends to remember the joy of his life in games. They touched our hearts incredibly by dedicating Classroom 1 in honor of Ethan’s impact.

Remembering Ethan Wang Campus House

Remembering Ethan Wang
Classroom 1, Second Floor
Campus House
1000 Mitch Daniels Blvd
West Lafayette, IN


Here are the words from the Campus House pastoral staff on the plaque in honor of Ethan’s life…

“Ethan graduated from Purdue in May 2022 with a Bachelor of Science in Materials Engineering. He loved Star Wars and video games, cheese and sushi, and was known around campus as the “roller-blading guy”, a nod to his passion for the game of hockey.

Ethan was part of a core group of students who saw us through the COVID-19 pandemic, including our year in “exile” in a temporary leased space as we tore down our previous building–remembered as “the mushroom” for its odd shape–and built this one. Ethan was a teacher and a learner, brilliant and brutally honest, an intense yet wonderfully hospitable kind of leader who loved Jesus and desperately wanted others to know the grace he had experienced. He wrote this in his notes one Sunday: “What you put at the center of your life affects what is at the center of the lives of those close to you”. For Ethan, that was undoubtedly Jesus.

He was excited about what God was doing in and through the Campus House community and, upon graduation, Ethan accepted a local job offer so that he could continue to participate in what Jesus was building here. Tragically, he died the week he was to begin this new chapter in his story. When Ethan put his faith and ultimate hope in Jesus, he was banking everything on the reality of the resurrection. The hope that he had is the hope that doesn’t disappoint, that can’t be cut short. It isn’t wishful thinking, but rather a living hope, the deep reality of life in Christ. As we gather in this space, we remember Ethan’s unshakeable hope in Christ and deep love for our community, and we honor all that God did in and through his time with us.”

We are forever grateful for Jesus’ work through Campus House.

Game RePlay: Revealing Joy through Games

A long time friend of mine held a Memorial Game night on June 9th 2023 with three friends she had not seen in quite a long time. Nancy Blume has never met Ethan in person; however, as fellow sisters in Christ, she has known him through prayer requests and sharing life stories over the years. I have been in bible study with Nancy multiple times in the 20+ years our family has been members of Christ Community Church. We have personally shared the ups and downs of life over these years. I love how she took to heart the idea behind the Jolt-On! Memorial Games and championed her own time.

June 9th Game Champion Nancy Blume (2nd from left) and Friends

In Nancy’s own words, here is the time she shared with us:

I have only known Ethan through your memories and stories and I am grateful every time you share Ethan with me. I shared some of these memories of Ethan with my Jolt-On Game Night friends before we jumped into games. When I decided to host Jolt-On, I reached out to a few friends who haven’t all been together for a few years and they all came. We started with Left Center Right, and I took Nicole’s suggestion about the “loot” and used Hershey kisses! Who knew chocolate would turn on the competitive spirit in our friend, Linn, who won three rounds in a row!! After that we switched to Dutch Blitz, where Carrie took the crown! Beth and I may not have championed in any of the games but we all treasured the evening of laughter, and reconnecting with friends.

Nancy also shared with me another way this time ministered to her. She stated she “re-realized” how much she LOVES playing games! She is now praying for opportunities to keep playing. This is really the spirit of Jolt-On! and the joy Ethan brought to our lives and others through games. The joy of community and time connecting together. We will be praying with you, Nancy, for the presence of game opportunities to be a consistent reality with those the Lord brings to your life.

Thank you, Sister!

Game RePlay: June 9th… Finishing Strong in a Year Without

365 days without Ethan. June 9th, 2023, has arrived very slowly. We marked Ethan’s first year gone and his Giant Leap into Heaven day as peacefully as possible today. No doubt due to the huge amount of prayer we have been supported with by friends and families. We have been very grateful for everyone whom joined in the Jolt-On! Memorial Game Days as well. You all gave us such strength to finish strong.

Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last;
but we do it to get a crown that will last forever!

1 Corinthians 9:25

After the anticipation of being back at Purdue and Campus House this week, we returned home and spent today quietly… enjoyed an Ethan favorite activity. Lingering at Barnes and Noble is one of his all time favorite things to do. We found ourselves contemplating favorite books (Mysterious Benedict Society Riddle of Ages volume 4, Science reads on how stuff works (yes, Randall Munroe!) and materials of our world, Math reads, explored new Lego sets with dreams of what he would be doing in the Lego sustainability world today (thinking also of our next annual Christmas memorial build set… most promising is the Lego Star Wars Endor Speeder Chase Diorama), enjoyed Studio Ghibli finds and browsing the huge selection of new games. We settled on purchasing a new card game for a Memorial Game play finale this evening and to add to our collection, Happy Little Dinosaurs.

365 Days now without you… missing you every moment… missing building memories with you… your laugh in the midst of games and conversation… your warmth and your smile. There is no “moving on” even with a year of firsts behind us. I know you would want us to keep going strong, so we continue to game-on your way… we can only seek to Jolt-On!

Game RePlay: Campus House Game Nite

We are so grateful for the staff and student community of Campus House at Purdue University. This is Ethan’s church. This is the community he chose to ground himself within while living at Purdue during his undergraduate years… he was deeply connected in fellowship and bible study leadership. Therefore, we invited the Campus House community and anyone else at Purdue into the Memorial Games on the evening of Wednesday, June 7th (2023). Even though it is summer semester and campus is quieter, it was a blessing to have about 25 in attendance to enjoy a wide range of games for the evening.

Joshua House Friends, David and Ben

We pulled out all kinds of board games and card games. The staff at Campus House know the value of game time very well. During Fall and Spring semester, they champion weekly game time for any student to join in. Having access to their collection was awesome! Here is a window into the time:

Blokus
Honestly, this was the first game I pulled out of the cabinet! Ethan and I played this game A LOT as he grew. It is a great strategy game for all ages. 2 to 4 players, though. It was fun to see it in action again!

Catan
This was a new one to me and several fans of the game came to enjoy it. There is a lot to the base game alone as well as many additions to the game that make it appealing for long term play. Lots to learn!

Dutch Blitz
This one is a FAVORITE at Campus House! During Fall and Spring semester, students are invited weekly to challenge their lightening fast speed and love for this card game. In the spirit of Solitaire, Nertz or Pounce, the Dutch Blitz card game uses a uniquely designed deck of cards. Many of the students gravitated to this one specifically and it was fun to watch them go!

Euchre
Another well loved card game in the MidWest, there were a few new faces to Euchre during our time. Some veterans shared their love of the game to teach it to those whom wanted to learn. Euchre is a team play card game employing the use of the Jacks as “Bowers” to set the suit of play each game. Ethan enjoyed playing this game with our family at just about every holiday back at home!

Minecraft
Noah brought along is Nintendo Switch and set it up on the large screen for anyone wishing to engage in video gaming. Minecraft was one of the first games Ethan had shared with his brother, Noah. It was fun to see a few of the youngest participants figuring it out for the first time!

Secret Hitler
Another new one for me, but not for the Campus House and Joshua House attendees! I found out many of them personally own the game and we could see the game circle grow quickly as it was brought out. There were well over 8 players seated around the game boards vying for one of three roles: Liberal, Fascist or Hitler! Set in pre-WWII Germany, players are German politicians attempting to hold a fragile government together. It took a few turns and a really good game mentor (thank you Four!) for me to get the flow of the game, but I eventually joined in. To play is to either bluff or investigate your way through. I loved seeing the multiple acting personalities come through in this exciting game!

Warhammer 40K
Noah challenged family friend, Jacob Chappell, to a W40K skirmish. It is no secret that our family loves the legend, lore and artistry of the model miniature game, Warhammer 40K. Ethan had actually introduced his friend Jacob to the game back in the days of high school when we lived in the Dallas TX area. It was fun for attendees to see the team models in action and learn more about the depth of the game.

During the event, we served cake and had the blessing of sharing fellowship time with many of Ethan’s friends that we have stayed in contact with during this long year. It was great to meet new faces around the game tables as well! Campus House is a community of believers whom seek to welcome all into the family of Christ. We certainly feel like a huge part of this family! It is very encouraging to us to see how the staff remember Ethan as they continue to welcome students at Purdue in the semesters to come. If you are a Boilermaker or are interested in the work and ministry of Campus House. Check out their website for more information!